1st October! Its today
The Big Day
So its the 1st October, to day is the day. I have been so looking forward to meeting my special boy, and nervous at the same time. Its a nice day, we where on our way to town to get things for hospital, i was told I'd be expected to go in by 3pm, so done the school run, gave my girls a big kiss and hoping to pick them up at 2pm before i go, was looking forward to a goodbye and big cuddles. That's not how it went unfortunately, i got the phone call at 9.30am to be in hospital by 11am. I felt like i was in a box with it getting smaller and smaller. It was all happening to fast.
Got there by 11am and they started the inducing progress. I wasn't dilated enough so they gave me a pessary to get me going, my contractions where coming fast, and they where very sore. It felt so unnatural, i should be at home eating curry and pineapples not doing it like this. Another family came in, their little baby has the same heart defect as our boy so i was stopped and had to wait as the ICU cant cope with 2 babies of the same CHD. I had a unsettled night as my contractions where still going but not as bad. My husband wasn't allowed to stay so he went home. We watched Eastenders together and chatted over the phone, i was so happy to see him the next morning. He came bearing gifts of cake and magazines.
We chilled watching some stuff on my tablet and in no time lunch was round, they told me to eat what i could because i was next to have my waters broke. I couldn't believe it. It was actually time.
Little did I know how weird it was to have it done. It felt like someone pressing on my stomach and i let out a big pee that went on for 4 hours. I had canulas in for dehydration, and also a drip of the stuff that makes your contractions come quicker. All i remember is needing the toilet, the nurse helping me, got into bed, Stuart was missing a lot of calls so he could concentrate on me, telling me i was doing good. In no time i was 5cm, so i asked for diamorphine and next thing i was asleep. The only time i woke i had to push. I felt like and elephant that had been shoot with a tranquilliser gun. i was in labour for all of 4 hours. I couldn't believe it, it was time to push.
I woke up with the midwife holding my hand on one side and Stuart on the other taking pictures of me completely out of it. (I didn't have the energy to tell him off, but when i saw the photos i thought it was a good thing to have for memories.) So i laughed it off.
the nurse checked me over i was 9cm so close, but i felt the need to push. So she had the whole medical team in the room with me, while i had my boys head hanging out of my nun, I couldnt concentrate on them i had to use what energy i had to get him out, i was so scared of hurting him i wanted it to be over with. Next thing I hear the nurse say its a boy, Stuart kissed me and said i done a great job. I had to have a few stitches so i had gas too get hem done. The doctors said he was a great size 7lb 4oz. I was so happy to finally meet this most incredible little human, who yet had to go threw the toughest time in his life. I got a few seconds before they took him off to get him all set up so the duct in his heart wouldn't close over. Stuart wasn't allowed to go with him. It was so heart breaking we had our boy but we couldn't give him a cuddle or even get the chance to give him his 1st kiss.
Next thing i woke up to Stuart on the phone telling everyone he was finally here, our boy Noah Andrew Harry Curran, born on 02/10/18 at 6.03pm.
I was still drowsy from all the drugs that i couldn't even get the strength to walk over and see Noah. My head was telling me to get up but my body wasn't listening. I was gutted, Stuart wasn't allowed to stay any longer. Stuart had seen Noah, he told me how beautiful he was and how much hair he had.
Then a nurse came and got me. Said i had to have a shower for going over to the ward with all the other mums. I was in tears, i was going to see all the happy mums with their healthy babies and hear them cry all night long. After we arrived i got into bed and fell straight asleep, i was told at any time i could go and see Noah as long as i felt up to it.
It was 4am by time i came round, didn't realise where i was, it was still a shock at what i had just been threw. I took a sip of water, and the nurse walking past my door stopped to see if i needed anything, so i asked to see Noah. She brought me round on a wheelchair, i still didnt have enough strength to walk the whole way. The journey round to PICU was long, well it felt long i was longing to see my baby, i neede to see him.
Out the lift we came and threw to doors we went. I washed my hands, and Noah was on my right 4th bed up from the doors, lying there all helpless and tubes sticking out of him. He had a full head of hair and he seemed so tiny. Tiny fingers and toes, his nurse said i could stick my hand in. I was so scared to touch him with all his bits on him, she showed me how easy it was. It felt like touching the most precious thing in the world. I rubbed his head and he moved to tell me he liked that, so i sat for over an hour just looking at him stroking his hair. It was one of the best experiences of my like. It might sound strange saying that, but knowing my boy who is a miracle liked the feel of me stroking his hair was just amazing.
So its the 1st October, to day is the day. I have been so looking forward to meeting my special boy, and nervous at the same time. Its a nice day, we where on our way to town to get things for hospital, i was told I'd be expected to go in by 3pm, so done the school run, gave my girls a big kiss and hoping to pick them up at 2pm before i go, was looking forward to a goodbye and big cuddles. That's not how it went unfortunately, i got the phone call at 9.30am to be in hospital by 11am. I felt like i was in a box with it getting smaller and smaller. It was all happening to fast.
Got there by 11am and they started the inducing progress. I wasn't dilated enough so they gave me a pessary to get me going, my contractions where coming fast, and they where very sore. It felt so unnatural, i should be at home eating curry and pineapples not doing it like this. Another family came in, their little baby has the same heart defect as our boy so i was stopped and had to wait as the ICU cant cope with 2 babies of the same CHD. I had a unsettled night as my contractions where still going but not as bad. My husband wasn't allowed to stay so he went home. We watched Eastenders together and chatted over the phone, i was so happy to see him the next morning. He came bearing gifts of cake and magazines.
We chilled watching some stuff on my tablet and in no time lunch was round, they told me to eat what i could because i was next to have my waters broke. I couldn't believe it. It was actually time.
Little did I know how weird it was to have it done. It felt like someone pressing on my stomach and i let out a big pee that went on for 4 hours. I had canulas in for dehydration, and also a drip of the stuff that makes your contractions come quicker. All i remember is needing the toilet, the nurse helping me, got into bed, Stuart was missing a lot of calls so he could concentrate on me, telling me i was doing good. In no time i was 5cm, so i asked for diamorphine and next thing i was asleep. The only time i woke i had to push. I felt like and elephant that had been shoot with a tranquilliser gun. i was in labour for all of 4 hours. I couldn't believe it, it was time to push.
I woke up with the midwife holding my hand on one side and Stuart on the other taking pictures of me completely out of it. (I didn't have the energy to tell him off, but when i saw the photos i thought it was a good thing to have for memories.) So i laughed it off.
the nurse checked me over i was 9cm so close, but i felt the need to push. So she had the whole medical team in the room with me, while i had my boys head hanging out of my nun, I couldnt concentrate on them i had to use what energy i had to get him out, i was so scared of hurting him i wanted it to be over with. Next thing I hear the nurse say its a boy, Stuart kissed me and said i done a great job. I had to have a few stitches so i had gas too get hem done. The doctors said he was a great size 7lb 4oz. I was so happy to finally meet this most incredible little human, who yet had to go threw the toughest time in his life. I got a few seconds before they took him off to get him all set up so the duct in his heart wouldn't close over. Stuart wasn't allowed to go with him. It was so heart breaking we had our boy but we couldn't give him a cuddle or even get the chance to give him his 1st kiss.
Next thing i woke up to Stuart on the phone telling everyone he was finally here, our boy Noah Andrew Harry Curran, born on 02/10/18 at 6.03pm.
I was still drowsy from all the drugs that i couldn't even get the strength to walk over and see Noah. My head was telling me to get up but my body wasn't listening. I was gutted, Stuart wasn't allowed to stay any longer. Stuart had seen Noah, he told me how beautiful he was and how much hair he had.
Then a nurse came and got me. Said i had to have a shower for going over to the ward with all the other mums. I was in tears, i was going to see all the happy mums with their healthy babies and hear them cry all night long. After we arrived i got into bed and fell straight asleep, i was told at any time i could go and see Noah as long as i felt up to it.
It was 4am by time i came round, didn't realise where i was, it was still a shock at what i had just been threw. I took a sip of water, and the nurse walking past my door stopped to see if i needed anything, so i asked to see Noah. She brought me round on a wheelchair, i still didnt have enough strength to walk the whole way. The journey round to PICU was long, well it felt long i was longing to see my baby, i neede to see him.
Out the lift we came and threw to doors we went. I washed my hands, and Noah was on my right 4th bed up from the doors, lying there all helpless and tubes sticking out of him. He had a full head of hair and he seemed so tiny. Tiny fingers and toes, his nurse said i could stick my hand in. I was so scared to touch him with all his bits on him, she showed me how easy it was. It felt like touching the most precious thing in the world. I rubbed his head and he moved to tell me he liked that, so i sat for over an hour just looking at him stroking his hair. It was one of the best experiences of my like. It might sound strange saying that, but knowing my boy who is a miracle liked the feel of me stroking his hair was just amazing.
Comments
Post a Comment